83% Of Nurses Who Work In Empty Hospitals Don’t Believe In The Virus

Health officials are reeling from the news that a shocking 83% of ‘nurses who work in empty hospitals’, don’t believe the virus exists.

An emergency meeting of the cabinet will be held this afternoon, to decide who will be blamed for this worrying state of affairs.

Insiders say early contenders for a public lynching are traffic wardens, teachers and anyone suffering from trapped wind.

A statistician explained, “Most of us have heard someone claim to know a nurse working in an empty hospital. It’s therefore reasonable to assume such nurses don’t believe in the virus. Under these circumstances, 83% is a very conservative estimate. Anyone who doesn’t understand that, simply doesn’t understand statistics”.