Angry Republicans Demand Biden Act His Age

Furious republicans have called on Joe Biden to ‘act his age’, after the success of the president’s whirlwind trip to Asia which would have taxed the energies of a man half his age. “What the hell is he playing at?” Ron DeSantis demanded while refusing to answer questions about why he has two capital letters in his surname.

The president’s busy agenda throughout the trip outraged Marjorie Taylor Greene who flatly refuses to hyphenate her surname ‘just to placate the woke agenda’. MTG said “The sheer audacity of using his public office to engage in a whirlwind of international diplomacy, simply to reject my claim that he is weak and disoriented, is breath-taking.”

Biden’s work rate was such that Fox reporter Peter Doocy, while waiting for him to hold a press conference, inadvertently admired it. “He has been basically working all through the night, the equivalent of an all-nighter Eastern time,” he said. Democrats gleefully compared it to Donald Trump’s dismal performance during a trip to France to commemorate the D-Day landings when he famously did not bother to attend the ceremony because it was raining.

Speaking to Tucker Carlson recently, Trump did nothing to dispel the suspicion he remains as disoriented as ever. The former president referred to the Panama Canal as “One of the true great wonders of the world”, before immediately correcting himself to say, “One of the nine wonders”, only to then add, “No, no, it was one of the seven’ before finally settling for, “You could make nine wonders?”