Meat Loaf Told ‘Bat Out Of Hell’ Not Appropriate As Charity Single For Covid Research

Meat Loaf, aka Michael Lee Aday, gasped earlier today, like a horrified maiden aunt.

Then he dabbed at his mouth with a heavily perfumed silk handkerchief.

“Did you tell them I’m offering to record a celebrity ‘Bat Out Of Hell‘ charity single in support of COVID19 research?” he asked his PR agent, Susan Kilfoyle.

“Yes I did.”

“And the problem is?”

“Some people think the link between bats and hell, is too close to the link between bats and the hellish suffering of coronavirus victims.”

“Did you offer them ‘Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad‘?”

“Yes but they said that, and this is purely in terms of vaccine research, you understand, two out of three suggests a lack of, well, precision…”

“Paradise by the Dashboard Light?”

“Doesn’t chime with social distancing.”

“How ’bout ‘I’d Lie for You (and That’s the Truth)?”

“That one, they said, was the same as ‘You Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth‘”.

“Remind me again?”

“The word ‘lie’ hints at a lack of trust and they don’t like the idea of taking anything out of people’s mouths right now?”

“‘I’d Do Anything for Love (But I Won’t Do That)‘?”

“It implies people should decide for themselves what they will or won’t do.”

“‘Read ’em and Weep‘?”

“Too downbeat, apparently.”

“‘Dead Ringer for Love‘?”

“I can’t repeat what they said.”

“I dunno why I’m surprised,” the singer said after a pause.

“They’re more brainwashed than that poor climate change girl, Greta Thunberg.”