New Musical About Joys Of Child Poverty Makes Triumphant Debut

A new musical by Andrew Lloyd-Webber about a gang of all singing, dancing & whistling-while-you-work street orphans, has made a triumphant Broadway debut. The English composer of Cats and Phantom of the Opera, said he was inspired by the current “ruinous state” of Britain after 13 years of Tory party rule.

“England is now exactly like it was when we ruled the world,” he said, “except for the fact that we no longer rule the world? Poverty is rampant, our rivers are full of excrement and huge nos of people depend on charity just to survive.”

Lloyd-Webber added that “Everyone knows that when times are hard, nothing cheers you up quite like seeing a group of pathologically cheerful street kids, warbling away about making the best of their grotesquely miserable lives”.