This Kind Of Thing Never Happens Round Here, Say Residents Of Area Where Thing Just Happened

“This kind of thing never happens round here,” residents insisted after the thing that never happens, had just happened.

“He kept himself to himself,” they said of the man involved, as if there was strong statistical evidence showing that those who kept to themselves, were never involved in this kind of thing. However, shortly afterwards, a detective confirmed there was absolutely no evidence that people who kept to themselves were never involved in the kind of thing that just happened.

The thing dominated the news bulletins and talk shows, throughout the day. The residents were eager to stress that the area where the thing just happened, was a very good one. And that while it was true that there was a very bad area nearby, that shouldn’t lead people to jump to conclusions about the area where the thing had just happened.

That would be very unfair to the residents of the area because the media never come to report on the many, many good things that happen there, without specifying what any of those things are. But most of all, the residents of the area where the thing just happened, made it clear how sorry they felt for the young people who came from the area.

People round here are very friendly, one resident said, once you get to know them. Another said they were fiercely proud of the area. All agreed that the media were only snooping around instead of reporting on the many, many good things that happen in the area.

What they should do instead, they said, is go back to the bad area where the thing often happens. Because people should be told about that sort of thing?