Man’s Promise To Keep Colleagues Posted On Gastritis, Not An Empty Threat

“I wish I didn’t know now, what I didn’t know then,” World of Magic employee Mallory Beaudoin warned colleagues today, via WhatsApp. “But I will never be able to forget what I heard from Gandalf this morning and in due course, I fear, neither will any of you”.

Beaudoin was alerting WoM’s eight other part time employees that general manager Greer ‘Gandalf’ Wynne had spent five long mins describing his latest bout of Gastritis. “G said 24/7 stress running WoM made him sit 30mins bent over on the loo WHICH HE MIMED!!”

After pressing send, Mallory resumed typing. “Promised to keep us all posted n that’s not an idle threat!”

Shortly after he’d sent the second message, Mallory received one from a number he didn’t recognise, asking an usual question.

“mallory means ‘bad luck’, y?”

After a moment’s hesitation, Mallory replied “y”.

“bad luck then. you’re on for nxt 4 wknds”

And with that, Mallory realized that he had indeed sent his messages to the WhatsApp group that included Gandalf.