Pence Exit Finally Has People Asking ‘Who Is Mike Pence?’

Mike Pence finally electrified the republican nomination race with a move that had ‘Who Is Mike Pence?’ trending across social media, as millions of people sought more information about this mysterious figure.

Pence, who “talks to God every night”, was unable to say how the Almighty felt about his exit because, he said, he hadn’t warned him in advance. “I sure hope he isn’t pissed,” he muttered.

Pence, who’s been described as somebody who has ‘all the charisma of a formaldehyde salesman’, said he will from now on devote his energies to ‘campaigning to prevent women from dining alone with men they aren’t married to, unless my wife is also present’.