Saudi Arabia’s Mohammed Bin Slaughter “Carves Up” 2034 World Cup

Saudi Arabia’s King Mohammed Bin Slaughter, the monster who had journalist Jamal Khashoggi tortured, strangled and dismembered in 2018, has been rewarded by FIFA with the hosting of the 2034 World Cup.

Mohammed the Bloodthirsty, as he is also known, wants to make Saudi a major player in global sports but the news that FIFA will rubber stamp the decision late next year, has dismayed human rights supporters all over the world. Particularly since ‘sportswashing’ (spending on high profile sporting events) is being used to soften its dire record on women’s rights.

Donald Trump boasted that he protected the King from congressional scrutiny, after Khashoggi’s murder.

FIFA president Gianni Infantino has long been seen as trying to steer the competition towards the kingdom ever since Santa Claus appeared to him in a dream and told him the King would make him richer than Pablo Escobar, if he ever managed it.

Legend has it that Infantino tried to negotiate with Santa but to his intense annoyance, woke before he could seal the deal, mouthing “Two Pablo Escobars?”