Israeli Strike “Surgically” Kills 81 People

Israel has carried out a ‘surgical strike’ in Gaza, killing a Hamas commander and the other 81 residents who lived in the same building.

A spokesman warned it might be some time before the air force could be absolutely certain he lived there or had died in the explosion but that it was perfectly clear everyone else did.

He released video of the strike ‘surgically’ levelling the building shortly after dawn and congratulated the pilot on a ‘job well done’.

Asked how killing 81 people in their homes could possibly be described as ‘surgical’, he replied, “In the old days, we might have had to fire a ton of shells to level the building and people would have called that a war crime? But now, thanks to our super accurate new missiles, we can say those 81 people have been ‘surgically killed’ instead.”